Botox dolls

I had a really good blog idea at about midnight last night, and for ages I couldn't remember what it was. Then as I was writing a blog about odd things I'd noticed these days, it came back to me: I wanted to rant about dolls.

Dolls freak me out these days. Barbie, Strawberry Shortcake and even Dora the Explorer (who I hated before anyway) are growing up or getting divorced. I think this is a mistake - there is no way I'd get "divorced barbie" for my kids if I had any! How can any child believe that love can last a lifetime if even their doll's getting divorced?

Of course, Barbie getting divorced is old news now. The latest doll scandal is Dora the Explorer growing up. You may wonder why I'm against this, since all children grow up one day? Allow me to answer with another question: what will Dora be exploring in her teens?

*hauls mind out of the gutter*

Seriously though, much as I loathe Dora (for reasons even I can't explain), she is a good role model for children all over the world. She encourages curiosity and open-minded about other cultures and languages, and a love of learning that I think should be taught in schools. Grown up Dora will apparently be teaching young girls how to put on make-up and go shopping (just what we need in this golden age of financial growth...).

Dolls don't grow up, children grow out of them, and companies should concentrate on the current generation of children rather than trying to keep those who are growing up and inevitably losing interest. What will the children who love Dora today think when their heroine stops exploring and starts shopping? Will they simply lose interest? Will they be disappointed? Will they miss her?

I think this trend of making dolls for pre-teens started with Bratz, a brand of doll that I find ridiculous in its sleazy attempts to sluttify twelve-year-olds.
I mean, look at them! Huge eyes, huge lips, huge hips and heads, absurdly thin waists, arms and necks, the kind of heavy make-up you only wear in nightclubs, high heels, and look at all that bling! They're wearing fur, for godssakes! And the worst of it is that children love these. My sister had several of them before she turned 13 and dolls became childish. What do these dolls teach kids? Barbie is a saint compared to Bratz!

Now I don't really think that Barbie and Bratz and grown up Dora will cause a huge wave of preteen eating disorders all by themselves. The main causes of teen eating disorders are peer pressure and an upbringing that emphasizes the importance of one's appearance over all other aspects. The "She's All That" idea is that while pretty girls don't need brains to succeed in life, brainy girls do need good looks, otherwise they will end up lonely spinsters and bag women. The same rule applied to men until recently, when nerdiness and geekiness became almost mainstream, but these are largely male phenomena, and female geeks are often rejected by both male geeks and "normal" females.

I could go on about geek phenomena forever, but that's the not point of this article. The point is that children aren't necessarily thick enough to think that they should all look like dolls.

However, I think Bratz should be banned because the companies seem to actually want that. Their aim seems to be to idolize skinny, make-up smeared, bling-covered teenage rebels in order to get preteens buying make-up and bling (squandering their parents money in the process). Toy companies are no more morally sound than any other company, and they'll do anything to make more money. Or am I being paranoid?