WARNING: This article contains spoilers concerning the film "Knowing".
Yes, I went to see "Knowing" today, or rather "Prédictions" as the French call it. To be honest it wasn't that bad, but it's much funnier if I unleash my inner Cynical Bitch and nastily point out all the crap aspects in the form of a detailed summary of the story:
It starts out in 1959 when, to celebrate the inauguration of a primary school, a class is asked to draw pictures of what they think the future will look like, and put them in a time capsule to be opened 50 years later. The idea came from a freaky little girl of the sort you'd expect to find crawling out of your TV - 50's version. But the "Ring" references don't end there: guess what the little girl is called? Lucinda Embry. :)


Anyway, little Lucinda doesn't draw a picture, instead she writes down a long series of numbers, and when the teacher takes the paper away to bury it in the time capsule, instead of taking another sheet of paper like a normal person, the child shuts herself in the gym closet and scratches the numbers on the door until her fingers bleed. When her teacher finally finds her, "The Sixth Sense" replaces "The Ring" as far as crappy references go, and she whispers "please make the voices stop!".

Fifty years later, the time capsule is dug up and little Caleb just happens to be the one to get Lucinda's list of numbers. His dad, who just happens to be an astrophysics lecturer, figures out that the numbers correspond to the dates and places of hundreds of past catastrophes plus the number of deaths. His wife, who just happened to die in one of these catastrophes, could have been saved if he'd known etc. etc. and there just happen to be three (why three? Why not four? Or two?) catastrophes to come. All of them happen to be not only in the US, but just around the corner from where the this man lives.
The first one is a plane crashing the the middle of a motorway. We see people running about in flames and screaming. The second is the derailment of a subway train. Our hero saves a mother and her baby, but we see loads of people being smashed to bits and coming out all bloody and screaming, like what happened with the world trade centre. At this point I was past wondering why this film was rated E for Everyone (in France it was - there were kids in that cinema). The third catastrophe - *dun dun DUUUN* - is THE END OF THE WORLD. By solar flare. Srsly.

At this point Our Hero (whose name is John - lol, how original) tracks down the daughter of Lucinda Embry (who, incidentally, committed suicide) and tries to get her to help him. Obviously she thinks he's some wierd stalker guy until his prediction comes true the next day. If all you romantics out there are hoping they fall in love or something, don't hold your breath - she dies before they get past a hug.
Then there's the fact that little Caleb keeps hearing Voices. At first he thinks it's his hearing aid, but then he recieves visits from these Matrix wannabes who keep giving him shiny little black pebbles for some reason. Then Embry Jr.'s little girl starts hearing them too. Then the news announces the End Of The World and the Matrix wannabes kidnap the kids and Embry Jr. dies going after them and John catches up to them. Then he finds out they are aliens and the two kids are the Chosen Ones and they are taken away to populate a new planet.
Then he goes back to his parents' house and hugs his parents and sister and everyone dies in a massive ball of flame. At the end we see the kids landing on this new planet wearing lovely white Chosen One clothes and several spiky space ships leaving them and all the other Chosen Ones to "start over" all by themselves. We see what looks like an apple tree in bloom in the background.
Ten thousand years later, two jedis land on the same planet and find a little blond "immaculate conception" type kid wearing very similar white clothes with phenomenal powers...
Oh hang on, that last bit was my imagination.

Yes, I went to see "Knowing" today, or rather "Prédictions" as the French call it. To be honest it wasn't that bad, but it's much funnier if I unleash my inner Cynical Bitch and nastily point out all the crap aspects in the form of a detailed summary of the story:
It starts out in 1959 when, to celebrate the inauguration of a primary school, a class is asked to draw pictures of what they think the future will look like, and put them in a time capsule to be opened 50 years later. The idea came from a freaky little girl of the sort you'd expect to find crawling out of your TV - 50's version. But the "Ring" references don't end there: guess what the little girl is called? Lucinda Embry. :)
=
Anyway, little Lucinda doesn't draw a picture, instead she writes down a long series of numbers, and when the teacher takes the paper away to bury it in the time capsule, instead of taking another sheet of paper like a normal person, the child shuts herself in the gym closet and scratches the numbers on the door until her fingers bleed. When her teacher finally finds her, "The Sixth Sense" replaces "The Ring" as far as crappy references go, and she whispers "please make the voices stop!".
Fifty years later, the time capsule is dug up and little Caleb just happens to be the one to get Lucinda's list of numbers. His dad, who just happens to be an astrophysics lecturer, figures out that the numbers correspond to the dates and places of hundreds of past catastrophes plus the number of deaths. His wife, who just happened to die in one of these catastrophes, could have been saved if he'd known etc. etc. and there just happen to be three (why three? Why not four? Or two?) catastrophes to come. All of them happen to be not only in the US, but just around the corner from where the this man lives.
The first one is a plane crashing the the middle of a motorway. We see people running about in flames and screaming. The second is the derailment of a subway train. Our hero saves a mother and her baby, but we see loads of people being smashed to bits and coming out all bloody and screaming, like what happened with the world trade centre. At this point I was past wondering why this film was rated E for Everyone (in France it was - there were kids in that cinema). The third catastrophe - *dun dun DUUUN* - is THE END OF THE WORLD. By solar flare. Srsly.
At this point Our Hero (whose name is John - lol, how original) tracks down the daughter of Lucinda Embry (who, incidentally, committed suicide) and tries to get her to help him. Obviously she thinks he's some wierd stalker guy until his prediction comes true the next day. If all you romantics out there are hoping they fall in love or something, don't hold your breath - she dies before they get past a hug.
Then there's the fact that little Caleb keeps hearing Voices. At first he thinks it's his hearing aid, but then he recieves visits from these Matrix wannabes who keep giving him shiny little black pebbles for some reason. Then Embry Jr.'s little girl starts hearing them too. Then the news announces the End Of The World and the Matrix wannabes kidnap the kids and Embry Jr. dies going after them and John catches up to them. Then he finds out they are aliens and the two kids are the Chosen Ones and they are taken away to populate a new planet.
Then he goes back to his parents' house and hugs his parents and sister and everyone dies in a massive ball of flame. At the end we see the kids landing on this new planet wearing lovely white Chosen One clothes and several spiky space ships leaving them and all the other Chosen Ones to "start over" all by themselves. We see what looks like an apple tree in bloom in the background.
Ten thousand years later, two jedis land on the same planet and find a little blond "immaculate conception" type kid wearing very similar white clothes with phenomenal powers...
Oh hang on, that last bit was my imagination.
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